It goes kind of like this… If you do not like the way your child is “behaving” talk to the child about the behavior and let them know that you love them, but you do not like the behavior.
To some degree, this technique can set parents up for disaster.
When we don’t like something a sense of resistance is present within us. Of course this may be what we experience when we observe our child(ren) doing something we don’t like.
At the same time, finding ways to love the behavior allows the child the space to move through the behavior back to connection with their own sense of well being.
Choosing to love the whole child, behavior and all, releases resistance and clears the way to integration of the child, rather than separation.
For example, a parent might watch their child hit another sibling. Understandably the parent is upset that harm has occurred.
In that moment the parent can think about the fact that the child is showing an imbalance and ultimately wants to get back to feeling good = balance. Loving the behavior for indicating the imbalance can help the parent respond with love and appropriate direction rather than disdain. Loving limits come out of love for the totality of a situation.
Try practicing complete love of your child in circumstances you initially dislike. Honor where you are and move towards love. It has a magical effect on the whole experience.